The day finally
arrived. Forrest Gump died and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met
by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed, and Forrest approaches the
gatekeeper.

St. Peter said, «Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you. We have
heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up
fast, and we have been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The
test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven.»

 

Forrest responds,
«It sure is good to be here, St. Peter, Sir. But nobody ever told me about
any entrance exam. I sure hope that the test ain’t too hard. Life was a big enough test as it was.»

St. Peter continued to say, «Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only
three questions.

  

 
First:  What two days of the week, begins with
the letter “T”?

  

 
Second:   How many seconds, are there, in a
year?

  

 
Third:   What is God’s first name?»

Forrest leaves to
think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waved
him up, and said, «Now that you have had a chance to think the questions
over, tell me your answers.»

  

Forrest replied,
«Well, the first one — which two days in the week, begins with the letter
«T»? Shucks, that one is
easy. That would be

Today and Tomorrow.» 

 

The Saint’s eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, «Forrest, that is not what
I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit for that
answer. How about the next one?» asked St. Peter. 
It continues

«How many seconds in a year? Now that one is harder,» replied Forrest, but I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve.» 
Astounded, St. Peter said, «Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven’s name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?» 
Forrest replied, «Shucks, there is got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd !! » 

Hold it,» interrupts St. Peter. «I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind…..but I will have to give you credit for that one, too. 
Let us go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God’s first name»?
«Sure,» Forrest replied, «it’s Andy.» 
«Andy?» exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter. «Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?» 
«Shucks, that was the easiest one of all,» Forrest replied. «I learnt it from the song, «ANDYWALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM  HIS OWN. . . » 
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates, and said: «Run Forrest, run!»

Forrest Gump, Heaven, conscience,